Oscar? Smoshcar …

The spoilt and rich of the film industry just got more pampered and even richer. This mutual m********n is nothing more than a gang-bang in expensive clothes.

The Happy Couple …

So, according to a press release from the Elysée Palace, Sarko married girlfriend Carla Bruni yesterday, Saturday 2nd Feb.

He met the former model in 2007, divorced his 2nd wife Cecelia late last year, and married Bruni within months.

I wish them all the best but his standing on the global stage has really taken a tumble … whirlwind romances are all well and good but this one has ’short-term’ written all over it.

Cheerio …

 

Jeremy James Anthony Gibson Beadle

In the 90’s “Beadles About” was in full swing and I was working as a cameraman. A job came my way and off I went to the location. I met the rest of the crew and was introduced to the host, Jeremy Beadle. My job was to follow Jeremy as he scattered fun in every direction.

At the time, Jeremy seemed to be the target of many a journalist’s poisoned pen, which was odd as this man was one of the brightest and most professional people I have ever worked with. It’s only a shame that some of today’s presenters can’t be more like him: gracious, professional and a decent human being.

One of the best day’s work I’ve had in 28 years …

His knowledge of the media bred contempt and here’s an example of how media-savvy he was: a few years ago at the Edinburgh TV Festival, he spelt out a warning to newcomers to the industry, “Never respond to the reporter who promises you the chance to give your side of the story. That means, ‘Kiss me because I am going to rape you anyway’.”

Beadle will always be about …

The Great Art Of Caring …

I’m not going to ask “what kind of world do we live in?” as I believe that the majority of level-headed people already know.

So let’s put a few irons into the fire and see who gets worked up into a frenzy … let’s see where this goes, shall we?

Nicolas Sarkosy, the President of France and his bride to be, the new First Lady (pictured). Do we care that she counts ex-lovers in order to get to sleep at night? Do we care that little Nicolas is both the youngest and smallest lover she’s had? What a superb advertisement for the country she truly is. By the way, you won’t see any anti-Sarko or anti-Carla stuff in the French newspapers – Nico’s friends own the media.

Amy Winehouse is currently ‘battling her drug addiction’. Really? Then why was a video if her ‘battling this addiction’ shown across the globe of her smoking crack cocaine while, at the same time, the public face of this silly bint is saying “it really is a problem and I’m doing my best to give up drugs”. If she wants to end up a drooling ninny by the time she’s 40, then let her. Life is hard and we all have to make decisions – not all of us have the same parachute-style bank balance to make it easier.

Pete Doherty. Lost cause – completely. No judge dares to jail the little twerp.

The Oscars may be cancelled due to the on-going writers strike. Who cares that the Golden Globes were nothing short of a press conference? Who cares that the Oscars may end up being the same style of presentation? Is all mutal handjobs anyway. Give the money away to charity and stop being so ‘me me me’ all the tie.

Hollywood Publicists seem to revel in the fact that one mention of one of their clients falling pregnant has the media clambering for details. I feel it would be far more newsworthy if the starlette in question could positively identify the father …

Britney Spears … I just can’t see the point. A career launched in 1999 and, to date, has sold 88 million records worldwide. She’s only 26 and the mother of two children and divorced. However, she’s a multi-millionairess … give someone of immature years so much money (as she was when she hit it big-time) and that’s what you get. People bouncing off the walls and in all sorts of emotion states … a state which the Hollywood media lap up like thirsty dogs.

English Premier Soccer Players are much like Britney. Young, rich and stupid. There’s a constant stream of spotty youths in ill-fitting suits, paying cautionary fines to British courts as they will insist on ‘going out on the town’ and beating some poor sod up.

I’m feeling a lot better now and, like myself, I thank you for not caring …

Whoo Hoo …! Applause, Applause, Applause …!

I’ve just been through a long and (quite honestly) pathetic process which allowed me to watch a ‘live stream’ of Steve Jobs giving his speech at Macworld.Ustream, as far as I could see, were the only outfit offering ‘live’ coverage of the event. I was on their site for a matter of 15 minutes and in that time I saw 1 frame of images (VT/film editors will know what I’m talking about). The picture just never made it and the sound was truly awful.It was also a typical American ‘corporate’ event … Jobs only needed to say “new”, “now available” or “part of the package” and the crowd in the room went completely whackko, screaming and “whoo-hoo’ing” for all they were worth.I’ll wait for the re-run on Apple.com … 

Josephine Rides Again …

Tsarkosy has a new love – both ’she’ and ‘it’ had all been stage managed by the Elysées press office.

 

In the weeks leading up to Christmas, Tsar Nick was photographed at Disneyland Paris with former model, now singer, Carla Bruni. A more wholesome family photograph you couldn’t have hoped for, his press office directing the show with just about the right amount of ‘tackiness’. 

 

Europe’s shortest leader (but with the largest carbon footprint) jumped into another plane with his new ‘love’ on Christmas Eve and jetted off to the Egyptian resort of Luxor – care of billionaire buddy Vincent Bolloré.

 

This was such a low-key event that Tsarsko waved at onlookers as the pair arrived at their luxury hotel. Security was as tight as a nats chuff and plain-clothed cops were deployed around the town. Two journalists were briefly detained on Monday night after filming the couple’s hotel.

 

Sarkosy, 52, divorced his wife and former model Cecelia, after 11 years of marriage last October. Now he’s picked up with another ‘former’ who, if you can handle the shock, has launched another career as a singer/songwriter. Bruni has been linked to men including Mick Jagger, Donald Trump and Eric Clapton, making Sarko not only the youngest but shortest lover. She’s only 39, so she’s packed them in somewhat.

 

It might be useful to learn that both Carla and her talent have been signed to the ‘Naive’ label. There’s a message in there somewhere.

They Did It Their Way …

According to numerous parent associations, the British government and the Police, children should be shielded (at any expense) from those who use drugs – actors and popstars etc.

However, Britain seems to be leading the ‘popstars in the drug-limelight’ championships. Take Pete Doherty, who has appeared in court on countless occasions on drug-related charges, yet has always walked away without a suitable prison sentence. The there’s Amy Winehouse, who’s drug-infested life is over-blown and, like Doherty, constantly being branded about the news and music media.

Don’t forget, kids can read too … and they look up to these icons of their generation.

If parents seriously want to ’shield their kids’ from such bad influences, then shouldn’t the media take the first step and dumb-down their coverage?

Why Keep A Gun In Your Car …?

You need to change a tyre on your car, so what would you normally do? That’s right children, you’d loosen the wheel nuts, jack the corresponding corner of the vehicle up, remove the wheel nuts and take the wheel off the vehicle.

Voilà … now swap the wheels.

Easy, no?

Well some redneck American is now in hospital with severe injuries after trying to do the same operation – except with a 12-bore shotgun.

The 66yr old man, who lives just outside Seattle, was working on his car outside his home when the accident happened. The final wheel ‘lug’ (as they call them) wouldn’t shift so with his trusty shotgun held at arm’s length, he blasted the wheel, peppering himself with gunshot and assorted wheel debris.

Police say that the man was working alone, and not drunk, was taken to hospital but is reportedly not in a life-threatening condition. Sadly, using the one-shell-treatment, he sustained injuries starting from his feet up through his abdomen and finishing at his chin.

A Darwin Award should be on its way to the hospital ward …

Bargain Basement …

I can’t say that I’ve ever enjoyed shopping. For me, it’s in and out. Get what I want and sprint for the checkout.

However, one of the last things Jacques Chirac (who he?) did when he left office was to improve and create closer ties with the Chinese government. To the extent that French business now has quite an extraordinary length of rope (or rein) in the People’s Republic. The latest out-crop of French consumerism to open its wings is Carrefour which has just opened its 101st hypermarket in China – Chongqing to be exact.

Knock-down bargains is one thing but when basic cooking oil rockets up more than a third in price, then something has to be done. Carrefour, the world’s 2nd biggest retailer, was to mark it’s 10th anniversary, so held a sale. Amongst which was rapeseed, at a staggering -20% off normal prices. The public were not going to miss out on that and so, as the doors opened last Friday, a stampede began, killing 3 and injuring more than 30 shoppers.

Is Sarko going to fly out and release the ‘trapped’?

Talking of which, I have it on very good authority that little Nikki has a new love in his life. Let’s just say that her surname is ‘Ferrari’ (no connection).

Watch this space as the French newspaper printing presses top-up their ink-tanks …

Blondes Have More Work …?

Sky News, the UK-based 24hr satellite news channel, seem to have been hitting the bottle with a rush of blondes.

Could this be a management decision to dye or goodbye?

Over a course of just 12 hours viewing, a bevvy of blondes are lined up, ready to present the news. Then there’s the stable of female on-the-spot reporters.

Yup, blondes again.